Little behind and feeling like I've been run over....

I am about a week behind on updates. Workouts have been good. Jim has upped the ante a bit in the cardio department. Which is great. I love feeling like I got my money's worth after leaving the gym. Sunday/Monday my left shoulder  blade area was in pain. Also my left foot was bothering me. Went to CB's dad (Father-in-law is a Podiatrist). He adjusted my feet, like a chiropractic adjustment but to the feet. It seems all of the core work that I have been doing at the gym with Jim could have had my feet a bit out of whack. My shoulder blade has slowly gotten better however the pain is now in my chest because I now have bronchitis. AWESOME! (not really) I feel like crud, I am supposed to take off a few days from the gym. I just want to sleep, but I have a ton of work to do for my Grad School Class. UGH!

Also, I need to take a moment to say this out loud.....
Back Story: On my mom's side of the family the cousin's my age have difficulty understanding that you 1. get married then 2. have babies. They have done all sorts of mixed up things when it comes to babies and marriages. With the exception of my sister and myself.
Part 2 of Back Story: I have a cousin that is only two months older than me, most likely has BiPolar (and no I am not joking or trying to be mean here) and has hated me for as long as I can remember because my parents stayed together and hers had the most tumultuous relationship I have ever witnessed.
Current situation: The cousin that hates me is pregnant. She choose to stop taking her BC because she thought having a baby would convince her boyfriend to stop cheating and they could get married or something. He walked away from her and now she is shacked up with some guy 20 years older than her that actually seems like a decent guy. She is that kind of person that puts up pictures of her pregnant belly as her FB profile pic and talks all day long about how she has gas or heartburn....or that they baby is kicking or ....blah blah SHUT UP! Wednesday night (also known as the worst day I've had in a while!--for other reasons this scenario just adds to the mess.) I received a text from her. "Hi, I am having a girl. Call Gma She wants to know if you will help host my baby shower." WHAT?!?! You think I would want to host your baby shower? Your Baby Shower?!?! For YOU?!?? The girl that came to Grandma's last Saturday and stood with your back to me for well over 30 minutes and spoke to me ONCE that entire 5 hours you and I were under the same roof??!?!?!
***Side note... I am also having a difficult time because I am married and I want kids and (in addition to the previous babies born out of wedlock from other cousins) this cousin, her sister, and another cousin are all out getting pregnant without a supportive male or even husband in their lives.... so to say I am jealous, maybe that they are so damned fertile..... but I know that CB and I are going to start trying soon (just not soon enough for me right now) and I am tired of hearing about these out-of-wedlock babies and that everyone thinks its ok to shack up with all of these random guys....***
Ok so where was I.... Oh yes, worst day ever, stupid-pregnant-shacking up with some older guy-cousin that hates me wants to know if I will help host her baby shower. I just got another message from her today asking me to contact our Grandma....
This all leaves me with this message to the big guy upstairs.....Hey God, I just wanted to tell you that I don't find my life humorous right now and would like to have the cliff notes version so I can figure out the point (meaning, significance) of this moment in my life... and then move on to the better parts of Your plan for me. I am in a dark spot and keep turning into more gray areas. I am over it and would love for You to take my hand and lead me out of it.... or at least whisper Your plan to me so I can participate in these day to day pains at least knowing that it will get better and how much longer it will feel like this.

Going to go take a nap then complete more grad home work....