Friday, September 9, 2011

There I said it....

Well I guess I can say it on here, since the one person that even reads this already knows and the rest of the world will know by Tuesday....
I am pregnant.
In the last 15 weeks of pregnancy some very funny or interesting moments have happened along with some "really?" moments where I learned something totally new and here is my list of them...

1. To start off, I am fifteen weeks pregnant but the little friend in my belly has actually only been there thirteen weeks.  Yes, pregnancy counts the two weeks before the little peanut is even made as part of the pregnancy. Weird? Yes, I agree.
2. The two of them.... those things that eventually will be a main food source for the baby... yea they get big quick! Already gained a whole bra cup... What the heck is going to happen in the next 15 weeks or the 10 after that?
3. There is a monopoly on preggo clothes. I think it is crappy that there are very limited clothing choices when it comes to maternity clothes. I am just beginning to show and so a little more space in my clothes is already something that makes my day go a little smoother. However, NO I don't want big horizontal stripes, NO I don't want a big bow that sits on my belly, and NO I don't want to only wear baby blue and pastel pink.
4. This piggy backs on the preggo clothes monopoly.... When I do find clothes that would be cute and would fit, they are always full price and never on sale and the only time they go on sale, is when there is only size XL or XS or in the color that I don't like or would look awful on me...
5. Speaking of looking awful. Hormones can do interesting things... the thing that hormones have done to me the most? Weepy? Angry? Giggly? Oh, no.... ZIT FACE! Break out central... and nothing fixes it!
6. Ok, complaint mode off... Here is a funny one: When you are pregnant and start telling people instead of a simple 'Congrats' or 'You will love being a parent' or even 'You will be a great mom' you hear: 'When I was pregnant..... (gross, gross, gross)... (blah, blah, blah)......' I have heard about people having irish twins, nights of no sleep, miscariages, getting pregnant "just because my husband looked at me".... People are hilarious when you say that you are pregnant. They will tell you damn near anything about themselves, most of it you wouldn't even want to know about yourself!
7. The first trimester brings you new things, prenatal vitamins, uncontrolable tiredness and waking up in the middle of the night to pee.... And when you do get up to go to the bathroom... good luck falling back to sleep...
8. Oh speaking of prenatal vitamins. I had a really bad day one day. I learned from my very smart sister that I needed to eat some protien when taking this heavily iron loaded pill.  That was the last bad day I  had (well that was vitamin related).
9. A little math riddle... 1 day of forgotten prenatal -accident, 2 days of forgotten prenatal - coincidence, 3 days of forgotten prenatal - oh crap a bad habit has formed!
10. Sonograms are fun! One day you get one and you see this little peanut, you go back a month or two later and you suddenly have a bouncing baby waving, dancing, fist pumping it is a baby after his or her daddy!
11. When you tell people that you are pregnant you hear things like "I thought you were getting poochy", "So-n-so, so-n-so, and so-n-so and I have been talking about you all week. We just knew that you were pregnant", and "I just knew it! Your boobs are sooooo big!!!"
12. I finally convinced myself and my husband of the following: It doesn't matter who knows at this point....A. We are happily married. B. We are adults. C. It is my husband's baby. (no Montel paternity test needed!) D. I am starting to show.....
13. I am a belly toucher. So I feel a bit hipocritical saying this but I really think that people shouldn't be allowed to touch a pregnant belly during the first trimester.... I mean really the only thing that you are touching is the fat roll I rolled into this pregnancy on.... so please stop. Or I will touch yours!
14. I miss Bloody Mary's, Beer, Wine, and Hot Toddy's.....
15. It feels really good when you pick out something to register for (side bar: When do you start registering? I need to look that one up!) and you find out that it has the top safety rating! Bonus!!

See you back here in 10 to 15 weeks for my newest rant, laugh, and/or update on this first time pregnancy business!

Monday, April 11, 2011

Lifting up a friend....


Lord I lift my friend to You.
I've done all that I know to do.
I lift my friend, to You.
Complicated circumstances
have clouded his view.
Lord I lift my friend up to You.

I fear that I won't have the words
that he needs to hear.
I pray for Your wisdom , oh God.
And a heart that's sincere.
And Lord I lift my friend up
to You.

Lord I lift my friend to You.
My best friend in the
world, I know he means much
more to You.
I want so much to help him, but
this is something he has to do.
Lord I lift my friend up to You.

There's a way that seems so right to him.
But You know where that leads.
He's becoming a puppet of the world.
Too blind to see the strings.
And Lord I lift my friend up to You.

Lord I lift my friend to You.
I've done all that I know to do.
I lift my friend, to You.
by: Casting Crowns
I recently stopped being clouded in my own vision and realized that my friend was in need of support. While she is still in need of support, and I have offered it. I am still sitting in silence waiting to support her in more than just a card telling her that I care for her and that I am here for her when she is ready. Love this song though. Just heard it and I feel that I could have written it. 
Praying for my friend. 

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

WOOOOPS!

I have been out of the saddle in the way of posting on here! Jim the trainer has been kicking my butt in training sessions, however.... tonight is my last one! VERY SAD! :( Monday night I felt very out of it and tired. He really kicked my but to the point were I was so physically exhausted I did an exercise wrong and when he corrected me I had to fight back the tears! (side note... I hate the BC I am on... ugh) I lost 1 1/2 lbs with in the last month and a half. I also lost a pant size. Finally some success. However, through out this experience I have been getting stronger physically and have felt the effects of the training sessions.
Hubby has lost 2 pant sizes! He finally had an interview for that job. It was last night. He seemed at peace after the interview. Not too excited, not too bummed. He just seemed like he went in said what he needed to say about himself and decided to let them worry about it. He will either get the job or stay at the crappy one he has and while that sounds like settling, he isn't. He is still daily looking for jobs in our area. Obviously the 129 applicants in this current job search shows why he has been looking for 5 plus years. He isn't alone in this hunt for a new job. He basically told the guy that at 33 years old he has never been inclined to drink, smoke or do drugs (great for them if he is on-call at night!), he has stayed at his job for 13 years (he is loyal), he doesn't know everything (humble) but is hands on and willing to learn (obviously good) and if he doesn't answer the phone if they call in the middle of the night his (mean, cranky) wife will poke him and tell him to answer the phone. HA! They told him he will know sooner rather than later about where he stands in this employment process. I am so hoping he gets it. I just don't know that he can continue to take all of this rejection before it makes him really down and depressed. As I type that I realize that it makes my hubby sound like a sad depressive guy... and really he has proved me wrong in this respect before. When his Mom passed away 3 years ago, I thought I had not only lost a wonderful friend but was going to lose my boyfriend to his grief. He actually has handled the loss so much better than I had predicted. I think that having God in our life has helped, having our friends' little girl Aria in our lives has helped tremendously too. She was born the day we buried Cathy and I have told CB's Grandma that Cathy whispered in Ar's ear before she was born to take care of CB. :)
WOW this post has gone a way I didn't expect! I guess that is because I had missed so many posts!

Happy Wednesday.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Back in the saddle

After a week of hacking up a storm and feeling like an elephant was sitting on my chest I am finally coming back to life. There are a few things that have made this last week a pain! Not only was I finding it difficult to breathe, sleep, stay awake and work out. I was also finding it difficult to teach, knit, take care of my duties as a wife (the cooking, cleaning and such) but also keeping up with my most difficult grad school class to date. Now it is bad if you can't breathe, sleep, get your house work done or stay awake. Sad if you can't work out or care to knit. Terrible if you are having difficulty teaching or getting your homework done for grad school!!! I am slowly returning to all  of the things that I am needing and wanting to do.
I worked out with Jim tonight. He didn't kill me but I am sure I will be sore! I also got caught up on one paper tonight (only 3 more to go to get caught up! sad, sad, sad!). Sleeping, staying awake, and breathing have returned to almost normal. House work has been helped by the wonderful hubby, although now he is sickly. My desire to knit is still at the blah level but I can't do it all!

Additional thought.... I have been very frustrated that at 5'2" 130 lbs I have not lost any fat weight since I began this journey of working out. I actually have lost muscle mass recently. Scary!  I have done some thinking and realized... Maybe it is stress or maybe it is my birth control. I began to do some research and found that I have been on a birth control that many women my age (with similar lifestyles and even similar heights)  have had really crazy side effects.... many of which I am experiencing but had chalked up to other things in my life. Such as, weird episodes of intense hunger or intense lack of hunger through out the month. Irritability. When I say irritability I mean I can't handle the pencil tapping, the whining, the inability to find page 21 in our book even though I have told  the child it is "THREE MORE PAGES FROM WHERE YOU ARE. NO! NOT BACKWARD, FORWARD." (this is when I realize I am yelling about a flipping page in the book and calm down) "Here, let me just find it for you." Thinking to my self, even though you are in 3rd grade and completely capable of finding it on your own...... Then of course I turn to the next kid and his book is closed and he is staring at the wall and the kid next to him... is on page 12..... (Commence: banging head on the table). Here is the thing.... I very well know that these kids have special needs. I can usually just keep my cool and get my self undercontrol and them on the same page, however..... not recently...
 Ok back to the side effects.... hair loss - thankfully no, acne - yea a little bit but not enough to make me crazy, still it is a pain, lowered sex drive - well you don't need to know my answer here. :) and lastly weight gain, or the inability to lose weight that has come on since beginning birth control.... to this I say... SON of a GUN! I knew I was eating right, working out right, not imbibing too much, praying (although I don't know if that helps... maybe I should fast...) and trying to live the right way without going over board... Turns out maybe it is stress.... and a bc that keeps the weight on... To which I say... just another reason to get off bc and start having babies. :) HA!

Last parting thought. If you are a believer, pray for my hubby and I. In March we plan to have the house on the market, meaning this loveable guy (pictured above) goes to stay at grandma and grandpa's for a while. We have to figure out how much we will be approved for (scary!!) and find the house of our dreams, or that will work for the time being.
Also, hubby has applied for a job in which he is 1 of 129 applicants. He happened to be fixing a lock for a person that is on the board for said job application and mentioned that he had put in an application. The parting words from that guy to  hubby.... I will have to dig through the stack and find your application. (He also said that all applicants will hear if they are still in the process or have been declined for interviews by the end of this week or next week....) keep the prayers going!!
Such a happy old guy! :)


Friday, February 11, 2011

Little behind and feeling like I've been run over....

I am about a week behind on updates. Workouts have been good. Jim has upped the ante a bit in the cardio department. Which is great. I love feeling like I got my money's worth after leaving the gym. Sunday/Monday my left shoulder  blade area was in pain. Also my left foot was bothering me. Went to CB's dad (Father-in-law is a Podiatrist). He adjusted my feet, like a chiropractic adjustment but to the feet. It seems all of the core work that I have been doing at the gym with Jim could have had my feet a bit out of whack. My shoulder blade has slowly gotten better however the pain is now in my chest because I now have bronchitis. AWESOME! (not really) I feel like crud, I am supposed to take off a few days from the gym. I just want to sleep, but I have a ton of work to do for my Grad School Class. UGH!

Also, I need to take a moment to say this out loud.....
Back Story: On my mom's side of the family the cousin's my age have difficulty understanding that you 1. get married then 2. have babies. They have done all sorts of mixed up things when it comes to babies and marriages. With the exception of my sister and myself.
Part 2 of Back Story: I have a cousin that is only two months older than me, most likely has BiPolar (and no I am not joking or trying to be mean here) and has hated me for as long as I can remember because my parents stayed together and hers had the most tumultuous relationship I have ever witnessed.
Current situation: The cousin that hates me is pregnant. She choose to stop taking her BC because she thought having a baby would convince her boyfriend to stop cheating and they could get married or something. He walked away from her and now she is shacked up with some guy 20 years older than her that actually seems like a decent guy. She is that kind of person that puts up pictures of her pregnant belly as her FB profile pic and talks all day long about how she has gas or heartburn....or that they baby is kicking or ....blah blah SHUT UP! Wednesday night (also known as the worst day I've had in a while!--for other reasons this scenario just adds to the mess.) I received a text from her. "Hi, I am having a girl. Call Gma She wants to know if you will help host my baby shower." WHAT?!?! You think I would want to host your baby shower? Your Baby Shower?!?! For YOU?!?? The girl that came to Grandma's last Saturday and stood with your back to me for well over 30 minutes and spoke to me ONCE that entire 5 hours you and I were under the same roof??!?!?!
***Side note... I am also having a difficult time because I am married and I want kids and (in addition to the previous babies born out of wedlock from other cousins) this cousin, her sister, and another cousin are all out getting pregnant without a supportive male or even husband in their lives.... so to say I am jealous, maybe that they are so damned fertile..... but I know that CB and I are going to start trying soon (just not soon enough for me right now) and I am tired of hearing about these out-of-wedlock babies and that everyone thinks its ok to shack up with all of these random guys....***
Ok so where was I.... Oh yes, worst day ever, stupid-pregnant-shacking up with some older guy-cousin that hates me wants to know if I will help host her baby shower. I just got another message from her today asking me to contact our Grandma....
This all leaves me with this message to the big guy upstairs.....Hey God, I just wanted to tell you that I don't find my life humorous right now and would like to have the cliff notes version so I can figure out the point (meaning, significance) of this moment in my life... and then move on to the better parts of Your plan for me. I am in a dark spot and keep turning into more gray areas. I am over it and would love for You to take my hand and lead me out of it.... or at least whisper Your plan to me so I can participate in these day to day pains at least knowing that it will get better and how much longer it will feel like this.

Going to go take a nap then complete more grad home work....


Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Punching bags and working the wrong muscles....

Tonight's workout was a bit crazy and quick paced. I got to punch the punching bag for a minute, do 10 tricep push ups and then repeat. WHEW! That took a bit out of me and I could really feel the stress melting away! The other part of the work out that was hard though was getting the right rhythm and technique to do so hamstring work out. I seemed to be working my back muscles instead of my glutes and hamies.... I can feel the twinges in my back that confirm I was doing it wrong....

Monday, January 24, 2011

Seriously....

Started off the workout with a sinus headache behind my left eye and an upset stomach. I told the trainer that I didn't know if he really needed to know... but that this was the week of the month that wasn't so good for me. I think I am glad I did because he rewrote some of our training plan. I assume that he knew I would be loosing iron at some point this week and he didn't want to be the reason I passed out! As we were walking to the area that he does some of my training I said "It is rather unfair and devastating to a woman that for three weeks I have been working very hard and then today I put on the workout clothes, that I have worn at least once a week for the last three weeks, and I look so bloated and fat! That is truly not fair." His response.... because he is a man and all men are stupid about things like this.... "Well I am glad you brought that up because I noticed and I wondered .....hmmm do I need to ask her about her meal plan....."
Seriously... thanks... tell a hormonal women "yeah I thought you looked fat..." Later while we were working out he made a joke about doing 50 more reps of something and I said "You know who is in charge here right?" He responded, "Me!" I said, "No, Me. I have a 6 lb medicine ball in my hand and you are standing right in front of me.... I could drop this or accidentally throw this in your direction.... Now again... Who is in Charge?" His response, "Me... no, you...." HA! That's right!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Green eyed...

Well today was another good workout with Jim. At first I thought he was going too easy on me... but he bumped it up a notch by the end. I am very green eyed though! Jim told me tonight that his wife was leaving Friday for 10 days on an, almost, ALL expense paid trip to Clearwater, Florida.
That leaves me with 2 thoughts:
1. I WANT TO GO TO FLA FOR 10 DAYS!!!
2. I think I should surprise Chris with a long weekend to Florida trip sometime this spring.


Off to go plan... (wink, wink)

Monday, January 17, 2011

New Week

Tonight was a much better workout with Jim. Having a lot of pain in my lower stomach muscles...I keep telling myself that one day (not too soon) I will have a 7 lb kiddo in my belly and those lower stomach muscles that hurt today will be holding that kid in!
HA HA!
Oh crap, that hurts my stomach to laugh!!

Look what I made!

Here is the Snuggie I made from an old fleece blanket for B. He asked me last year for a snuggie. I began working on it and for some reason (start-itis) I set it aside and forgot about it. His Aunt Ri has one and I think his mommy does too.... so he really wanted one. I took a very large fleece blanket, cut some sleeves and sewed them to a slit I made in the fleece blanket. I then added the B of layered fleece pieces to be sure that everyone knows that this is B's snuggie. His cousin L is already asking when I will start make her's...hmmm... 

Next up.... The KORN Blankie! This blankie was a request by my friend Dawn. It is a double knit using 2 and 1/3 skeins of black Plymouth Yarn - Encore worsted weight and 1/2 of a skein of white Encore. This blankie is washable and dryable. 
Now, Why would I make a KORN blankie? Well Dawn is friends with Ray Luzier, he is the drummer in KORN and he will be becoming a dad very soon it sounds. 
Here is the finished front.
Here is the finished back, but I didn't like that the double knit didn't hide the white very well....
So here is my solution, I added a satin backing. 
I got a text message at 11:45 last night telling me that Ray was STOKED! Very excited for Ray, Aspen and soon to be born baby boy. I hope they like the blankie for a very long time. 
I am especially thankful to Dawn for asking me to make this. It was a great learning experience. 
:)

Friday, January 14, 2011

AHHHH Finnally!

Two hours at the gym. Did everything, except had to cut the stepper short.. I couldn't seem to do it... and gave in to it and quit. Felt great afterwards!!

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

UGH UGH UGH

I don't know if I am going to get through this week. Today's workout was brutal again. Jim must really like to see me hurt or listen to me say, "yeah sure I can do thaaaaat....." as I try to do something like stand on one leg with a 12 lb weight and then squat down and touch the weight to the ground, as I stand up I pull the weight up to do a "row". While that sounds like a foreign language, I can actually do it. I can also do many other things I never thought I could do. However, today.... this week, I have not been able to do as much as I wish I could.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Monday and I'm (not) alright....

Well I have since found out that my trainer Jim was the person that the EMT's took out on a stretcher. He had had a seizure. Scary right. I think that he wanted me to work till I passed out tonight to make up for it.... I did some "frog hops" and other exercises and let's just say that by the end of my work out.... I was DYING. I felt like I couldn't breath and I had muscles in my body that I didn't know existed screaming in agony. Need a hot bath and a glass of wine.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Saturday Cardio and wake up call!

Today I went to the gym in the morning after my prayer group. I wasn't really feeling it. I was just feeling out of it and after 20 minutes of cardio.... I saw EMTs carrying someone out on a stretcher. It looked like my trainer... but I don't know if it was ( I was looking at the mirror and saw the reflection of the person on the treadmill.) I ran for 5 more minutes and busted out of Fit Club... no need for the EMTs to need to come back to get me next!

Friday, January 7, 2011

2 hours of Awesomeness

Tonight I spent 2 hours working out at the gym. I was working out by myself. I felt great afterward.... That is until I got home. I was ready to vomit! I think I didn't have enough of a snack before I left for the gym and after 2 hours of working my tail off... I was HUNGRY. I finally feel like my self again... although it is bedtime....

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Love/Hate Relationship

I attempted to post this last night, but blogger wouldn't even let me type.
______________________________________________________________
Day 2 at the with the personal trainer Jim was more pain worthy than Day 1! He also worked with me longer that he was supposed to. I hope that wasn't a no no, and the way I am feeling today... I don't know if I want longer times with him! My major areas of pain are in my oblique muscles and my quads. We did that fancy body weight/fat percentage (etc etc) scale. The verdict is I am actual up 2.2 lbs since last year (same weigh in day even!) my water weight was up 2.3 lbs, my muscle weight was up 1.2 lbs and my fat percentage was down...... 1.7 lbs!!!  YAY!!! All of those numbers mean that I may have gained 2 lbs but I lost fat and gained muscle and water weight! Water weight is good because it means you are hydrated! Also one more way to gloat for me.... I have 23.5% of my weight as body fat. 21% is the good range for women! :)

Monday, January 3, 2011

First night with Jim at the Gym

This year, CB and I decided to start the new year off right and get 20 sessions (each) with a personal trainer at our gym. I am going to try to blog about each workout session for the next 10 weeks. There should be 30 posts in all, because we do two days with Jim and one day alone each week. We are also supposed to do cardio three more times a week to really get our hearts and bodies in shape. However, I am not the daily blogger, so I think that I will stick with the workout days. Today I am going to write before and after this experience! In addition to this goal of getting fit in '11, I am also hoping to be better at showing what I have knitted or crocheted on here this year, so that I know what I have accomplished by the end of the year. This year end was spent with a lot of "oh and I made...." and " oops, forgot I also made...."

3:45 pm: Still at work, should be finishing up progress reports for my students (they are due by Friday)
 I am sitting here nervous thinking Jim is going to kick my BUTT! I think that CB is pretty nervous about that too. He kept asking me if Jim was going to do a fitness assessment tonight or just get to the work outs. I think for me he will get to the workouts having worked out with him before as a free service at the gym. Work out is at 5, better go eat something to give me some energy for this training session.

6:45 pm:  Walked on the treadmill for 10 minutes then met with Jim ended with a cool down walk of 10 minutes on the treadmill. He made me work for it! I did exceed his expectations a bit I think. At one point he said I needed more weight for an exercise and even said "KB you are a Beast!" I know there will be hard days.... but today was a good start!